Jealousy
I saw this topic briefly mentioned on a blog I visit regularly, and I thought it was definitely worthy of a longer mention. I'm speaking of jealousy, specifically the jealousy one woman feels when either a good friend or even an acquaintance finds love and she doesn't. I have been the harbourer of this kind of jealousy on many occasions. When I was in high school, I was the one who never got any dates or never got asked to dance at school dances, while the rest of most of my girlfriends' social lives were buzzing. I remember so well the feeling of pretending to be happy for a friend when she told me she was going steady with a guy. I remember the fake smile, the fake enthusiasm, very well.
All of us want to be loved. When we see other people around us being loved on a regular basis, and we continue to be alone, we feel unworthy and angry. I know I did. As I have gotten older, I have become (thank God) more mature and more philosophical about it. I look back on those times when I was that lonely teenage girl with so many dreams and hopes unrealized, and I feel total compassion for her. Of course she was jealous. Why shouldn't she have been? She was a beautiful, sweet, funny, smart girl, and she might as well have been invisible for all the good it did her.
It's funny now, because last week I lied to a friend of mine to get her to babysit my daughter while I went out on a date. I knew she would be jealous if I told her I had a date and would probably not babysit as a result, so I told her I was going to a seminar instead. I'm practical, you see. I remember all too well that I'll show you somehow feeling, so I used a little reverse psychology.
There is nothing more vindictive or scheming than a jealous woman. Trust me.
All of us want to be loved. When we see other people around us being loved on a regular basis, and we continue to be alone, we feel unworthy and angry. I know I did. As I have gotten older, I have become (thank God) more mature and more philosophical about it. I look back on those times when I was that lonely teenage girl with so many dreams and hopes unrealized, and I feel total compassion for her. Of course she was jealous. Why shouldn't she have been? She was a beautiful, sweet, funny, smart girl, and she might as well have been invisible for all the good it did her.
It's funny now, because last week I lied to a friend of mine to get her to babysit my daughter while I went out on a date. I knew she would be jealous if I told her I had a date and would probably not babysit as a result, so I told her I was going to a seminar instead. I'm practical, you see. I remember all too well that I'll show you somehow feeling, so I used a little reverse psychology.
There is nothing more vindictive or scheming than a jealous woman. Trust me.
posted by emily pound at 6:23 AM
5 Comments:
So how did your date go? Have you heard anything back from the flurry of interviews you had? Hope everything goes wonderfully for you and that you find the man of your dreams and a job you will love!
Hi Andrea,
Good to see you back here again. The date was okay. It wasn't great because we were both a little nervous, I think. But he seems like a nice guy and was a little on the sexy side. :-) I don't want to jump to conclusions though. Sometimes guys who seem nice turn out to be the opposite. We'll see what happens.
As far as the job prospects go, things are happening. Today I got an offer for a 3-month contract with a contract renewal or full-time employment promised (my choice). But I may also have another job offer coming tomorrow. This other company has been calling my references and from what they tell me, I'm a shoe-in. My dilemma: Job A (the contract) is better money but a lousy workshift (late afternoon-evening) and Job B pays less but is a "regular" workday shift and closer travel-wise. So if I do get this other job offer, I'll definitely have to think about it. It seems nuts not to go for the better-paying job, but it will radically change my lifestyle. Who knows, though ... maybe that's just what I need. :-)
Hi Jennie,
I have been backstabbed so many times, I know exactly what you're talking about. Women can be very conniving sometimes and definitely live up to the "bitch" label. When I was at my lowest weight, you wouldn't believe the wary, icy stares I got from the women around me. They did NOT like me looking that hot. Sometimes it made me so uncomfortable I "dressed down" as a result. (I'm talking about women I worked with.)
I'm always here, just not always commenting (most of the time because I'm at work and I don't have the time to say what I want to), but believe me I can relate to things you write about almost 100% of the time :) Even the last post. My best friend of 20 years is no longer my best friend because I found the man of my dreams and moved 2 hours away. When I tried to mend fences with her there was nothing but a few nasty emails no matter how civil I tried to be. In the end, I just stopped responding. She is miserable in her life, in a loveless marriage and it's impossible for her to be happy for anyone else when she is so unhappy herself. Still makes me sad though. I miss her, just being able to call her when something exciting happens in my life and not being able to share it with her really bites.
Hi Andrea,
That's too bad. It sounds like she was reacting not only from jealousy, but probably sadness at missing you as well. It saddens me how we can be so close to people at times, they are really a big part of our lives, and then all of a sudden, for whatever reason, they are just not there anymore. It's too bad. I understand your missing her. I know exactly what you mean.
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