My Built-In Bullshit Detector
You know, for all the bitching I do about my weight ... all the pain and abuse I have endured ... I have to say there is one big advantage to being overweight, as I guess there is with any, for want of a better word, disability or handicap. It really makes it easy to discover who is an asshole.
Through the years, I have encountered people who have made my weight an issue, and others who haven't. I think it's fair to say that more people have made my weight an issue than not, but the ones who haven't made it an issue are precious to me. They are the people I truly consider it a privilege to know.
I have met lovers, employers, friends, acquaintances, who made it clear in one way or another that my weight was not acceptable to them. Whether it was because they personally found it repulsive, or unattractive, or embarrassing ... whatever the reason ... it made me realize that these were people I was lucky to have nothing to do with. If I had been thin when I met them, it would have taken me longer to discover their true nature. I'm sure this personality trait of theirs would have come out eventually, in some other way. They probably would have found something else about me that was unacceptable ... my hair colour, my clothes, whatever. Superficial people always find something, that's for sure.
I'm not denying that it hurt. These people can be very charming and deceptive for a time, and when you find out the truth, it's like a fist in your face. It hurts. But I realized, in the long run, that it was far better to be rid of them than to continue to love them or "enjoy" their company. When a relationship is based on pretense, what is it worth? Absolutely nothing.
I far prefer to try and find and bring people into my life who truly love me for who I am. It sure as hell isn't easy, these days. Kind of like looking for a needle in a haystack, come to think of it. But I'll put my glasses on and rummage through that haystack until I find the people who are worthy of my love and regard.
Through the years, I have encountered people who have made my weight an issue, and others who haven't. I think it's fair to say that more people have made my weight an issue than not, but the ones who haven't made it an issue are precious to me. They are the people I truly consider it a privilege to know.
I have met lovers, employers, friends, acquaintances, who made it clear in one way or another that my weight was not acceptable to them. Whether it was because they personally found it repulsive, or unattractive, or embarrassing ... whatever the reason ... it made me realize that these were people I was lucky to have nothing to do with. If I had been thin when I met them, it would have taken me longer to discover their true nature. I'm sure this personality trait of theirs would have come out eventually, in some other way. They probably would have found something else about me that was unacceptable ... my hair colour, my clothes, whatever. Superficial people always find something, that's for sure.
I'm not denying that it hurt. These people can be very charming and deceptive for a time, and when you find out the truth, it's like a fist in your face. It hurts. But I realized, in the long run, that it was far better to be rid of them than to continue to love them or "enjoy" their company. When a relationship is based on pretense, what is it worth? Absolutely nothing.
I far prefer to try and find and bring people into my life who truly love me for who I am. It sure as hell isn't easy, these days. Kind of like looking for a needle in a haystack, come to think of it. But I'll put my glasses on and rummage through that haystack until I find the people who are worthy of my love and regard.
posted by emily pound at 1:15 PM
1 Comments:
I think people who judge on weight will judge on other issues as well, but there are some who are just so hung up on weight(I guess because of a fear that they'll catch your fat disease which will infect them)that this seems to be their main blind spot.
There are enough great folks around to worry about the multitude of mule headed folks. Find the pearls and avoid the swines.
Huge
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