You Know You're Not In Love When ...
I saw a post on another blogger's site about being in love and I decided to do a list of the opposite. Aren't I romantic? :-)
Sorry guys, this is strictly from the female point of view.
Okay, here goes.
He asks if you'd like to go back to his place and you're really glad you're out in public with a lot of witnesses around.
He kisses you and your first thought is, Oh my God, what is that horrible taste?
You're on your first date and you find the tablecloth more interesting than his conversation.
You see him for the first time and you're disappointed but you make an effort. Then, you see him a second time and you're still disappointed, but you make an effort. The third time ... you know you're not willing to make the effort anymore.
He asks how many men you've had sex with and you tell him the truth. :-)
When you're out somewhere with him, you see a cute guy pass by and smile at you and suddenly you really wish you were by yourself.
He makes an indecent suggestion and you just laugh uproariously and pat his knee.
You're making out with him really heavily and actually really getting into it, but then you start thinking about your old boyfriend who you still think about 20 times a day, and then you just pretend it's him, and you get really turned on.
During sex, he's saying Oh baby oh baby and you're staring at the ceiling thinking, Hmmm, I wonder why the swirls go this way and not that way?
After sex, you thank God he rolled over and went right to sleep.
You hear this monotonous drone beside you but you're kind of tuning it out and then you realize he's asking a question and you say, "Hmmm? Sorry?" This happens about 15 times a night.
He says, "You know, I really don't think this is working out," and you are just so relieved.
Sorry guys, this is strictly from the female point of view.
Okay, here goes.
He asks if you'd like to go back to his place and you're really glad you're out in public with a lot of witnesses around.
He kisses you and your first thought is, Oh my God, what is that horrible taste?
You're on your first date and you find the tablecloth more interesting than his conversation.
You see him for the first time and you're disappointed but you make an effort. Then, you see him a second time and you're still disappointed, but you make an effort. The third time ... you know you're not willing to make the effort anymore.
He asks how many men you've had sex with and you tell him the truth. :-)
When you're out somewhere with him, you see a cute guy pass by and smile at you and suddenly you really wish you were by yourself.
He makes an indecent suggestion and you just laugh uproariously and pat his knee.
You're making out with him really heavily and actually really getting into it, but then you start thinking about your old boyfriend who you still think about 20 times a day, and then you just pretend it's him, and you get really turned on.
During sex, he's saying Oh baby oh baby and you're staring at the ceiling thinking, Hmmm, I wonder why the swirls go this way and not that way?
After sex, you thank God he rolled over and went right to sleep.
You hear this monotonous drone beside you but you're kind of tuning it out and then you realize he's asking a question and you say, "Hmmm? Sorry?" This happens about 15 times a night.
He says, "You know, I really don't think this is working out," and you are just so relieved.
posted by emily pound at 2:29 PM
3 Comments:
LOL! Oh lord yes... I laughed so hard reading this. Great entry, brutally honest, as always.
~Lily
You forgot about "he asks you if you would make out with your female friend in front of him and you find yourslelf considering it the better option" haha
Good list for me to remember though :)
:-) Glad you enjoyed this, guys. I was chuckling while I was writing it.
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