"I Said 'Black ... No Sugar!!!' "

It's funny how something so seemingly inconsequential can become such a pain in the ass. On my way to work every day, I used to stop at this donut place at the subway station to grab myself a black coffee. I LOVE coffee. I could not live without it. I go through approximately 2 "real" coffees (meaning, with caffeine) and about 3 decaffeinated coffees per day. Anyway, it became my habit to stop by on my way up the escalator to catch the bus to fortify my travel with some caffeine. My order was always the same: "Black, no sugar." Then one day this new woman started working there. Every time I went in and ordered ... the SAME thing, every day ... she would fuck it up. Or ask me endless questions. One morning it went like this: "Next!" "Black, no sugar, please." "With cream?" "No ... Black, no sugar." "With sugar?" "NO ... BLACK! NO SUGAR!" I swear to God. How fucking simple can a coffee order get? You take the pot, you tip it towards the cup, and you pour the fucking stuff in! When she brought it back to the counter, I checked, and sure enough, she had added cream. "I said Black, no sugar ... you added cream." "You said regular." "NO I DIDN'T ... I said Black No Sugar." A man was standing beside me and I saw him smile, raise his eyebrows and shake his head. Anyway, I would go through something like this with her every morning. It was evident that English wasn't her first language, but come on ... I'd figure her grasp of English had to be at least rudimentary to get the job, and how difficult is "Black No Sugar" to understand? It got to the point that when I stopped for coffee, I would tense up as I waited, hoping I wouldn't get her. There was another girl working there. Then one morning I decided, Okay, I'll relax and trust that she's finally got it. I gave her my order. I didn't check. When I got up to the bus and opened the lid to take a sip, I saw she had fucking added cream! "That stupid fucking bitch!" I fumed. Since then I have not ordered coffee from there. But on the way home from work yesterday, I got a nice surprise.

A Cinnabon Express stand just opened up at Sheppard station. Guess where I'm going to get my coffee from now on?